stagnant students

writing to my peers without sounding preachy  without privilege unsuspectingly running unchecked is a practice

‘no way you’re a gentrifier’ an uber driver said to me like it was some sort of grade to my humanity i think she defined them by how open their hearts are

interactions with peers is competitive banter

a judgment a gradation a fact check a detachment from the heart from True understanding Knowledge and connection to be first best or right

aligned to what definition? what virtues define your righteousness? how would your Teacher your Guide your God[(-s)-desses)] grade your in class participation? your practice?

uninformed debate is a detrimental desecration of collective communication

of Power

walking the edges of my mind has been as equally enlightening as isolating

\ do you have to be isolated to understand? to travel? are there better ways to use what ‘traditionally american’ values we know we know to speak on our passions? our rights?

working/existing in the oakland unified school district has been

well its been

there are a lot of problems. problems i use my heart to feel my eyes to see my mind to study…and my Truths to try to fix

right now i am shopping for my masters degree and it is one of the only ways i feel powerful

being centered before buying into the game is not a lost hope

deeply study the way people move have moved and will move before you must sell any parts of yourself to them

i have been taking my time because these periods of privileged personal growth have been pivotal and prioritized

aspects of ascension administer answers and aloneness allows advancement

perspective a personal pilgrimage

and identifying the problems with the education system is an experiential journey

for people of color an extended consciousness to daily reality

writing about things documents them forever – with a potential to time travel

building ‘better’ schools only concentrates issues

charters catalyze capitalism and conviction of kids

teaching happens at the mercy of your administrator (i.e the local gov’t)

implementation of knowledge is intentionally indoctrinated

although i have been deeply inspired by the leaps in inclusion of technology to curriculums i see attention spans that are tech reward driven

traditional work is rushed to apply concepts to a more innate medium

real regulated reading requirements are rare

how do we create more balance  there?

how do we create culture cultivating community plus parental participation under the systemic circumstances?

how do we find more faculty on campuses that can see with all their parts?

do you have to sell out to make things relevant? do you have to use increased force to be heard?

can a system be changed without carnage?

no matter how long i think how much i write i fight being trapped in internalized isolation

a downward infinite spiral of super self aware helplessness

forever fighting fear of failure

(define failure)

Seeing that cynical sentiments cease to succeed to self sacrificial service

scholarly success sometimes solicits spiritual sacrifice

pathetically pieces of paper permit power

so i buckle up and down

alter the screenplay of my own reality to continue to nurture the balance between passion and practicality

exit mind

enter heart

n stay ready

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